(HotDQ-13) "It's all over my face!"

"This could be our password!"

This time, our heroes find themselves needing to follow-through on their promises to Snapjaw (one of Venmir's disposable allies) and find the remaining leadership of the Dragon Cult and chop them into little pieces. Easier said than done - especially for our uncanny adventurers! 

Starring, in order they sit around the table:
Nyvan, (played by Jason) a elven knight, voted "Most likely to suffer acid damage" by the entire world.
Venmir, (played by Brett) an elven clergyman, the cold-hearted priest of war, voted "Most likely to curse loudly when the room is empty" by everyone else in the group! 
Sigurd, (played by Iain) a travelling swordsman (absent this week).
Rodin, (played by Lorne) the sullen dwarven axeman, voted "Most unlikely lifeguard" by himself.
Nandrin, (played by Hilton), the elven mage, voted "Least likely to use his thieves' tools" by those who know he has them (which is now everyone!).

and The DM, (played by Alex), who loves to comment in blue. And writes this blog. He's also a bit of a git and likes to make life difficult for his players.

Tonight's session was a man down from the start due to uncontrollable circumstances, but never fear, loyal readers, because the remainder are more than capable of getting themselves killed in a horrible, horrible fashion.

They stood in a room dominated by mist. Under the mist, a mystical pattern, which Nandrin had identified as a teleport circle, lay unusable. With the password, it was just a drawing on the floor. That said, the heroes weren't even sure it was of any relevance, after all, there was still a few corridors to check and who knows what else was down here...

That said, they still tried a few words, briefly tried scraping the markings off the floor (a dwarven approach to magical sigils), then gave up.

They walked down a corridor, which lead to a wide ledge around the side of a large underground lake. Now that they were unfettered by human eyesight, their elven and dwarven eyes made out that the lake went further than they could see - and there was a small piece of rock jutting out in the lake, at the centre of which sat a large frog, eyeing them warily. 

They took their time and considered approaching the frog - some of the group suggesting it may be appropriate to parley with the beast - until Vanmir slammed the door down with a devastating revelation - "It's just a massive fucking frog. It won't talk, it will just try and eat you!" - which the others accepted, and they moved on.

They eventually came to a large room, filled with rubble and junk, boxes and piles of refuse, which they decided to scour, before being surprised by a huge creature bursting out of it's lair on the far side of the room. After a fierce battle, the carrior crawler was dispatched, almost as a warning to them about sticking their noses in mess (no, they will never learn - see later!).

They rested then, setting a guard, and spent the next eight hours relaxing. There was no disturbances, and they continued their exploration. They went back to the room where they had defeated Borngrey and Spattergoo - and took a different tunnel, finding themselves in what could only be described as frog temple. The room was full of frog idols, some of which looked recent, while others were obviously much older - some crude, and some well done. The party ignored them, as sick of frogs as the lizardfolk upstairs were.

The next room was almost as odd. In it were three things - a chair, a small table and a wooden chest. In the minds of our heroes, chests mean loot (as they do for millions of other adventurers) and there was a small rush to see who would open the chest. Venmir scanned the area, before lifting the latch on the lid. 

Almost immediately, a number of small pots fell from the ceiling, most of which shattered on the floor.

"Cover your face!" shouted Rodin, as he covered his nose and mouth. The others obliged, but instead covered their eyes and sucked in big lungfuls of a strange powder in the air. 

To Nyvan, Venmir and Nandrin, the room changed. They found themselves in a hell world, surrounded by fog, shadowy figures and, worst of all, huge giant frogs leaping at them through the air! Nyvan and Venmir ran for their lives, while Nandrin ripped out his sword and swung it at the nearest frog.

Rodin leapt back in surprise and barely parried the elf's swinging sword. "Watch it, burnypants!" shouted Rodin, as he countered with the side of his blade, striking the mage across the shoulder.

They traded blows, before Nandrin panicked at the strength of the frog in front of him and ran from the room. Rodin followed as quickly as he could. 

By this time, Venmir and Nyvan had found a nice and safe, but very wet, refuge from the frogs. They waited for the frogs to leave.

Rodin caught Nandrin in the room where they had previously battled the cultists. Swinging his axe in a huge arc, it connected with the side of Nandrin's head, and his eyes rolled back as he dropped to the floor unconscious. Rodin quickly tied him up, like a hog, and went looking for the other two crazy elves.

For Venmir and Nyvan, time passed slowly. Somehow, they knew the frogs were waiting for them - but their new hiding place was great - nothing could see them - even if it was a little damp.

Rodin checked the teleport portal room - nope, empty. He ran through into Frog Lake, looking out over the water. Still nothing! But wait, what was that? Bubbles? Was there something down there? Rodin looked into the water, but without light, he could make out nothing. More bubbles broke the surface.

Venmir and Nyvan started to relax. The frogs were gone, surely, but why leave this place, it was comforting and friendly. They stayed where they were.

Rodin lay down on the ledge and stuck his stubby arm into the water, swirling it around to see what he could find. Fully expecting his arm to be bitten off at the elbow, he was surprised to find his hand tangled in seaweed. He grabbed a handful and pulled it out, somewhat surprised to find it attached to Venmir's head. He pulled the elf from the water, and checked a little more, before long dragging Nyvan from the water as well. Their exposure to the spores over, they both quickly recovered and they all returned to where Nandrin lay on the floor, trussed up.

As Venmir and Nyvan eyed their potential prey, Rodin untied the mage and slapped him into wakefulness. Nandrin was groggy and angry.

The party continued their search of the area, but found nothing. That lead to a debate - where were the bad guys? A number of ideas were considered, including the use of boats across the underground lake, before Venmir announced that he thought the most likely thing was that they had used the portal. Slowly, the others came round. That said, they had no password, and were dejected. They travelled back to the surface.

There they found the lizards moving around the castle and, when they found out that Spattergoo was dead, the courtyard quickly changed from a scene of industry, to one of celebration, the lizardmen dancing and cavorting around the heroes, much to the discomfort of them all. Before long, Snapjaw approached to thank them for their efforts.

"Sadly, the trail has run cold and we have no way of following the remainder of the cultists through the portal!" said Venmir, overcoming his utter hatred of lizardfolk to speak with their leader.

"Aye, we'll be heading out soon. We don't know the password." confessed Nyvan. The others nodded their heads.

"Did yous check all the humies rooms?" asked Snapjaw, "cos yous pinkskins is always writing things down - when yous could just remember things. You pinkskins is crazy."

"Oh, pish, we haven't checked the last tower! It's the biggest one!" cried Nandrin. The others nodded their heads.

The heroes found themselves in the final tower. The ground floor was plain and empty, having obviously been used as a chapel to Tiamat, but the second lead to a library and a sorting room. They spent some time searching through the books - the elves trying to find books on magic, especially portals. Rodin found a book with lots of pictures.

They traipsed up to the third floor and found themselves in the most opulent room they had found yet. It was obviously an office, with fancy chairs, a desk and benches. On the desk was a series of papers, which they searched through, finding one which read "Portal: Draezir".

"This could be our password!" exclaimed Nyvan. The others nodded their heads.

They continued their search, finding a small shrine to Tiamat, as well as a sitting room, then finally a bedroom. It was terribly fancy. There was two wardrobes, one of which had a dragon drawn on the front of it. Nyvan announced he would search the wardrobes and stomped up the one with a painting on the door and pulled it open. He was surprised by a cloud of acid spurting over his face. He screamed in pain and frustration!

"It's all over my face! Without any warning, it's all over my face! And my chest." he rolled around on the ground in agony.

"Take off your clothes!" shouted Venmir. 

Nandrin and Rodin looked like they were about to panic.

Eventually the acid wore off and Nyvan was able to continue, his armour pitted with acid damage. Venmir hovered nearby, keeping an eye on his best bud.

They travelled down to the portal room. There they stood around the circle.

"Draezir!" shouted Rodin.

"Portal: Draezir!" shouted Nandrin.

"Say Portal Draezir!" shouted Nyvan.

"Draezir." said Venmir, after he stepped into the circle. He disappeared from view.

"So nothing has worked?" asked Nyvan, looking up from his scribing toolkit where he was doodling pictures of Nandrin, tied up on the floor (in modern terms, he was checking his mobile phone!).

Everyone stopped to look at him. 

"Nope, nothing." said Rodin, "Apart from Venmir disappearing through the portal!"

"Oh."

The others followed suit - and found themselves in a woodland. It was cold, very cold, and the trees around them were evergreens, coated in frost and snow, the ground underfoot was hard and unyielding. Venmir stood a few feet away.

"I didn't want one of you to suddenly appear inside me..." he blushed.

Up the hill, on a few hundred feet away, stood a manor house. It dominated the area, and had a kind of elven feel about it. There was an insignia above the door, which the elves thought they recognised, but despite some determined thinking, they couldn't remember which house it was. 

As they stood around, thinking intently, two trolls walked around the side of the building. They all noticed each other at the same time and the trolls roared as they charged the heroes.

Nandrin quickly loosed a spell which caused one of the trolls to suddenly start moving in slow motion. The other was unhindered and leapt into the middle of the party, laying about ti with it's massive claws and snapping at the party with it's huge teeth dripping saliva.

The battle was bloody and not short. They all suffered at the claws of the beasts, their armour rent, and bodies wounded. Rodin in particular found himself shattered and broken, barely surviving one particularly deadly outburst (he took 33 damage in one round!). Finally, with the use of fire and a lot of hacking, the trolls lay dead on the floor, never to return (?).

They walked up thte manor house and let themselves in. They ignored the cloakroom and rudely walked in without cleaning their boots.

Behind the cloakroom was a hall, bedecked with demonic figures and suits of elven platemail on stands. A large staircase lead up to the first floor and many doors lead out of the room. They quickly found themselves in the kitchen, where they were unceremoniously shooed from the room by a set of busy cooks. Venmir bristled with anger, but stopped short of the slaughter of innocents.

They checked some more rooms - including one with a strange tapestry which seemed to have moving trees in it, a small sitting room and finally, what they believed to be the kitchen staff's quarters.

"Let's go back in the kitchen..." said Venmir.

"What for? They'll just throw us out again!" said Rodin.

"Because there was a doorway in there we didn't use!" said Venmir.

"There's loads of other doors to check!" announced Nandrin, let's go back to the hall. 

("Please do!" thought the DM - a huge surprise ready for the group - it was going to be grand!)

"OK, we'll walk back...."

And at that point, one of the players stood up, having already packed away his kit and announced it hometime - much to the DM's horror and followed by much cursing!

(to be continued)